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My wife and I have a 14 year-old cat that we adopted from a shelter 5+ years ago. We average 3-5 play sessions a day that last anywhere from 5 to 25 minutes. He only likes to play with one toy (plastic stick with a yard of yard on it) and only at his scratching post. It doesn't matter how often or how long we play with him. Within a few minutes, he is trying to get us to play again. He'll follow me around the house meowing, sit by his food bowl hoping I'll feed him - at which point he tries to get me to chase him to his scratching post, and then, if he doesn't get a play session, he starts picking out his fur. We have had him checked by multiple vets for the fur-picking and they have all agreed it is behavioral, not an allergy or anything else.

And he "insists" that whoever is playing with him be fully involved. He will literally stop playing and stare (and then start picking out his fur) if my wife and I are not looking straight at him and playing with some enthusiasm. I have literally played with him for 40 minutes straight, until he walked away. Withing 2 minutes he was begging for more play time. And it's all day. When we wake up, are trying to make breakfast, getting ready for work, trying to leave for work, when either of us comes home, when we are watching TV, and EVERY time he comes back in the house from outside. We kept him as an indoor cat for the first two years until we both got so exhausted by his constant badgering that we let him out to give ourselves a break.

I give him lots and lots of affection if he insists on getting on my lap (always while I'm reading or trying to get something done on the laptop) and on those rare occasions when he'll just sit near me/us in bed or while we're relaxing. The problem is, often when I give him affection, he takes it as an overture for another play session. I am at my wits' end. I go into the bedroom and close the door in order to get a break from him so that I can read, send an email, etc. I have researched this, but every site just says, "Oh, well, your cat just needs more attention and play time."

And the only way he leaves me alone is if I hiss at him. Basically, I have to scare him in order to have a life when I'm home.

Any suggestions besides giving him even more attention and play time?

Journeyman Geek
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At my wits' end
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  • He has you very well trained. You may have to tolerate his picking at his fur for a while, since he has apparently learned that this gets your attention and is taking full advantage of it. – keshlam Mar 21 '24 at 18:03
  • @Allison C Thank you, but no. He doesn't play with other toys including ones with food or that require problem-solving, isn't willing to stay with a routine, and takes whatever pace he chooses regardless of what we do. – At my wits' end Mar 21 '24 at 20:54
  • @keshlam We don't "give in" and start playing just because he starts picking his fur. I mention the fur thing because it is just another annoying layer to the problem. What I'm hoping for is a way to get him to leave us alone without my having to hiss at/scare him.' – At my wits' end Mar 21 '24 at 20:55
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    I'm not a vet, but it sounds like your cat might have some behavioral problem causing the "fur picking" (aka psychogenic alopecia or over grooming) that might need medication. Perhaps the hyperactivity is related. It's unusual (but not completely unheard of) for a cat that old to want to play that long. – Kai Mar 22 '24 at 14:47
  • It sounds like he might react well to having another cat to play with? Always hard to predict, and see past answers re how to introduce another animal into the household with minimum stress. Or he might object to get competition for your attention. Or both at the same time. – keshlam Mar 24 '24 at 13:49
  • Has any vet ever checked his thyroid levels? Kai is correct in their comment that this level of hyperactivity is very uncommon, but an overproduction of thyroid hormones could explain it (and that would be treatable). If there's no physical cause, it sounds almost like a form of OCD to me -> a certain action must happen in a very certain way and he tries again and again to manipulate his environment into the desired behavior. If that doesn't happen, he's so stressed that he picks his fur. OCD is very hard and lengthy to treat in dogs, no idea how OCD treatment for a cat could even look like. – Elmy Mar 25 '24 at 11:33
  • @Kai He's been checked out at a couple of vets about the fur picking and restlessness. They have no answers. I wish they did, because it doesn't make sense to me that he wants to play so much. – At my wits' end Mar 28 '24 at 20:26
  • @keshlam We tried. He was an asshole to the other cat. Would wait until the cat was taking a nap and then attack. The other cat ended up very aggressive with him. Because the other cat was nice and much more likely to be adopted into a home, we surrendered the other cat. – At my wits' end Mar 28 '24 at 20:28
  • @Elmy We've had his levels checked every year. Nothing out of the ordinary. I agree with the OCD vibe. And neither the vets nor anyone else seems to know how to deal with it. They just chalk it up to he has a high energy level. – At my wits' end Mar 28 '24 at 20:30

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