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I am a software developer and I have an older coworker (60+ years old) who comes to me every time he has a question about anything involved with computers. Most of the time I am busy and I have no idea what the answer to his problem is, but no matter how many times I tell him this he winds up asking me the question two or three more times, and always comes back with more questions later.

He is also using these questions as a way to start idle conversations and I would like it to stop. How do I communicate to him that I cannot and will not help him with his problems (as it is the IT department's job) and more importantly make him understand that I believe that idle conversations are not O.K. for the workplace especially when everyone is busy?

I'd like to avoid being too direct with him as at least three other developers sit near me and all of them would hear me putting my foot down.

starsplusplus
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CincinnatiProgrammer
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    Amazing... there are other people in this world like my coworker. Only, he's not 60, he's 28, and he comes to me for everything. Also, he happens to be another programmer, and tho I'm not his manager, or the lead developer, or the architect, he still asks me how to do almost everything. Also, he constantly forgets everything, just today he forgot the entire data structure of our primary application even existed when we just had a big deal over it a couple of months ago. There may be help for Paul, but for me, i fear there may be none. – Jrud Feb 27 '13 at 19:08
  • @Jrud Ouch, this guy likes to ask me about setting up printers and where to buy ink cartridges and stuff, and asks the question about three times before giving up. He isn't a programmer though so I guess it is understandable. If you have to work directly with your coworker I feel sorry for you! – CincinnatiProgrammer Feb 27 '13 at 19:35
  • I get questions like "How do I install a windows service?", "How do I get the ID of the logged in user?", "Whats the task ID of the task I just got assigned?", and my least favorite "Hey, would you mind taking a look at this?" it wouldn't be as annoying if I wasn't the only one he ever asked, I just happen to be in the cubicle next to him, and work on the code in the same project as him a lot of the time. It leaves me to wonder, if he can't do work without me standing over his shoulder showing him how to do it, then why do we even have him doing this work? – Jrud Feb 27 '13 at 19:52
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    @Jrud I'd imagine it is because companies like to pay the lowest amount for labor, and so he was the lowest "bidder" when your company was hiring. It is probably better to hire 4 great programmers for the same price as hiring 5 bad ones, but convincing management of this fact is difficult (10 amateur artists can't paint the mona lisa, you need a da vinci to do that). – CincinnatiProgrammer Feb 27 '13 at 19:56
  • He has written manuals on how to install windows services, he must have asked me that logged in user question 10 times in the past week, and the task ID's are listed on our UML documents next to the work description, as well as searchable in the source library, and I'm not the one that assigns them in the first place. Usually he calls me over for misc. problems when he's stuck on a problem. He lacks the ability to think outside the box when problem solving, so usually I try to give him two or three ways to fix his issue and leave, but he often insists I sit there and watch him implement it. – Jrud Feb 27 '13 at 20:04
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    I love the mona lisa-da vinci analogy, very well put. I want to use that haha – Jrud Feb 27 '13 at 20:07
  • Anyway, maybe your coworker will retire soon... 60+ year olds tend to do that sometimes. – Jrud Feb 27 '13 at 20:15
  • @Jrud I believe I got that quote from Joel, I'm too lazy to find it on his dead website now though :P – CincinnatiProgrammer Feb 28 '13 at 13:47
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    Paul, it sounds like your coworker is using you for rubber duck problem solving. Give him a duck. – Amy Blankenship Mar 03 '13 at 19:55
  • Here's one more idea: you can agree to have a beer or two with him after work. There are different manifestations of senior age, some folks become talkative, some caustic, but they are humans nonetheless and they want some socializing. – Deer Hunter Apr 27 '13 at 16:31
  • Why don't you talk to him? ;) – Jim G. Apr 27 '13 at 22:36

5 Answers5

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Don't be "The IT Guy" or some other technical void, be a human being. That can help with the worry of being too direct. I suggest getting up and walking this person over to the desk of the person who can help. Feel free to chat along the way. Offer to address other questions that you can help him with at another time when you're not so busy.

Side Note: Idle conversations are OK and are the only way to build relationships with other people. Like everything else, too much is bad, but don't dismiss a practice that has been going on for centuries. Other departments/people are going to make requests and have problems which it is your job to fix. I want them to know they're asking Jeff O to handle it and not the "programmer' or the IT dept. I'm the guy that drinks too much coffee, loves football and movies. I'm nice to you; be nice to me. Although I do care about fixing problems to make other people's job easier, I go home after work, sleep at night, and do other fun things over the weekend, so don't expect me to work 24/7 on your problem - I'm not a machine.

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It sounds like he thinks you are approachable and knowledgable, this is generally a good thing.

If you want to handle this gently then you're going to have to drill a little deeper and figure out the root of the reason he comes to you. Here are a few things that I've seen (or done) and some suggestions that might help:

  • He may not like interacting with the IT guys. I've known a number of IT guys and there is a small section of that population that thinks everyone else is an idiot. You might try walking him over to meet the nicest of the bunch the next time he has a problem. When you indtroduce them to each other make sure to compliment that IT person on their knowledge and patience when solving your IT problems.

  • He may be bored and need a break. If this is the case then your best bet is to NOT become instant gratification for this need. Always politely say you'd like to finish what you're working on and then you'll walk over and see if you can help him find an answer. Then your desk is not the place that answers come from, it's not the place for social interaction, and it's not a good place to stroll over to because nothing happens for him there.

  • He may not know the best way to get the answer. If this is the case you may be stuck teaching him how to use the tools (do it at his desk) or you can always walk him over to the expert (or ask the expert to come over to his desk) and make a polite introduction and a polite exit.

  • He may just want a friend. If you don't mind being his office buddy then try to cut the chitchat short but offer a time when you can chitchat, like take a break at a specific time and make plans to go for a walk. If you don't want to be his office buddy then you may end up in the awkward position of playing 'office buddy matchmaker' and trying to introduce him to someone with similar interests. That's hard to do tactfully, so they may get the hint you're trying to pawn them off. It's not 'putting your foot down', but it can still be awkward and hurtful so be wary.

  • He may be a clueless social leech. You may want to set up a rescue system where someone calls you if he starts going on and on. Best if this is a couple of different people that can be on the lookout and take turns making the call for you to come over to their desk and look at something for them.

It's probably a combination of several of the above and you'll have to adjust your strategy accordingly.

DKnight
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    We had a rescue system. I actually built in a hotkey into one of our internal applications that would send out an email to a few people to get rescued from this type of person. He was nice enough, and he certainly had plenty of work to do, but he could get stuck on a tangent and talk forever. – Dave Johnson May 20 '13 at 21:32
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Two fairly straight-forward solutions, here:

  1. If a business question, just let him know that you are working on something and would like it if he could send you an email about whatever the ask is so you can address it later.

  2. If it's a social call, stand up and go get some water/coffee. Lead him away from your desk to an area where it's acceptable to be social. Give him a minute or two and then leave him in the social area. If he tries to follow you back to your desk, politely let him know that you are busy working on a project and will catch up with him later.

Hope this helps.

Data Monk
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"Putting your foot down" does not have to be condescending or rude. Just say in a cheerful tone "I'm busy right now." And say this every single time he disturbs you during working hours.

Eventually he will get the message.

Consider that entire days can be destroyed by people who chat incessantly, and those days can easily turn into weeks of mild to poor productivity. Don't forget the 15 minutes to refocus rule. You're so busy looking out for the other guy and not hurting his feelings, that you're completely ignoring self-preservation: if this guy chews up hours each day, he could be badly hurting you.

To preserve the social relationship, you should answer his question and within 5 minutes, ask him out to dinner to continue the conversation. If I'm right about this person, he will say no, because people like this are actually trying to burn time, and are using you to do it.

jmort253
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bobobobo
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    Downvoter, you should explain – bobobobo Mar 04 '13 at 15:50
  • I am not a downvoter but I'd imagine they downvoted you because in a few sentences you just said "ignore him" and they disagreed. – CincinnatiProgrammer Mar 04 '13 at 17:58
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    Maybe that's why they can't get their annoying coworkers to stop bothering them – bobobobo Mar 04 '13 at 18:06
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    @bobobobo - The downvote is for suggesting simply being rude. – Donald Mar 05 '13 at 12:48
  • How is politely and cheerfully saying "I'm busy right now" rude? I've tried a lot of different things with people who tend to pester, and this actually works to let you get your job done, without damaging the relationship too much, and without making you seem too much of a jerk to the other people in the room. You would like to get your work done. You have a right to express that. – bobobobo Mar 05 '13 at 15:08
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    comments added to post: Hi bobobobo, I added your last two responses to your answer, as it greatly improves it by explaining your reasoning. Hope this helps! – jmort253 Apr 27 '13 at 03:08
  • the 15 min to refocus rule is crap, i wish joel never imagined it up. now every IT person in the world wanders around blithely being rude... *in the march for increased productivity* – bharal May 21 '13 at 09:13
  • @bharal SHUT UP YOU'RE INTERRUPTING ME (just kidding). No but really, I don't think Joel made it up, it came from somewhere else for sure. The flipside is, consider it rude to interrupt someone when he is working. – bobobobo May 21 '13 at 15:54
  • @bharal:The amount of time to refocus depends on the mental effort required for the task you are working on. If your work is not mentally taxing then 15 minutes wouldn't be applicable. There are many articles quoting researchers readily available; "The 15 minutes is said to have come from a Microsoft Study", some studies claim 8 minutes and some as high as 23 minutes. I think it all depends on the type of work being done. All articles consistently claimed that even very short interruptions cause significant lost time of productivity. I didn't see any studies claiming your belief at all. – Dunk May 21 '13 at 21:42
  • Wha? Which studies are you seeing at all? I (admittedly, once) googled for "time spent refocussing" and got nothing concrete at all. Still think it is balderdash. – bharal May 22 '13 at 16:19
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No one is born as a genius.You learn from experience and mistakes and you move on.Unless your maturity level makes you consider yourself the ideal person in the world who don't make mistakes, doesn't need anyone else's help(which obviously reflects from your statement), you don't have to put your foot down or talk down on a coworker who needs help and unfortunately thinks you are the person to ask for.

I agree with one other poster about walking the guy over to someone who can help resolve the issue or even finding a contact number for them or a website link if they have one.That's what I had done in the past, so the next time the guys asks me help, I will inquire if he used any of the 3 resources I provided before.

yonikawa
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    Hi decent guy, welcome to the Workplace SE, a Q&A site. How should the asker solve this problem? On The Workplace SE, answers posted should answer the question in full. Consider using this [edit] link to answer the question? This will prevent your post from being removed by the community. Good luck! :) – jmort253 Apr 27 '13 at 03:03
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    Would also suggest changing your avatar to really fit your nickname. – Deer Hunter Apr 27 '13 at 18:31
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    @ Deer Hunter : I would recommend visiting this url and first get some facts about the avatar you commented about.http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swastika#Hinduism – yonikawa Apr 30 '13 at 22:17