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Yesterday I found out my ex girlfriend and her mentor she had an affair with might become consultants helping out on my teams project.

She used to be a pretty toxic person and I found some forum posts by him (posted under a pseudonym) where he posted raging answers, indicated that he works on personal projects during billed hours and says things like "it's great, you don't have to work, you get paid, and no one really can blame you for your work not being done in time".

I'm not sure I'd be able to stay professional here, and, based on the type of person she was, I'm also worried that she will be more focused on ruining my reputation than doing her job. I feel biased due to my previous contact to them both. They don't know yet that its me they might soon be working with.

My goal is it to simply inform my superiors about what I found out and the fact that there is a bias that might cause problems. But I want to do this without appearing unprofessional nor making the impression that I want to influence the managements decision in my favor, because that's not what I'm aiming for. I just know her and know that she probably won't stay professional. If I'm wrong, all is fine for me.

Would it be appropriate to inform my superior, who is involved in contracting the consultants and hope they believe my judgment and what I researched?

If so, how should I inform them? Should I show them his posts? This would require to disclose my previous contact with him, to definitely verify that the person having done the posts is the person we contracted.

Bernhard Barker
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Zaibis
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    The 4th option is posting your findings on here on stack exchange, having the guy recognize himself from your post, and having to deal with the fallout after you've made a potentially bad situation even worse. –  Aug 16 '17 at 06:30
  • @Pete: I first had in mind to prevent that posting this annonymously, but asked my self then why should I care? I really don't get why that would be my problem. But please help me udnerstanding why this would make it worse. – Zaibis Aug 16 '17 at 06:33
  • @Zaibis It's kind of obvious. Put yourself in the place of either of these two contractors and then read your question again from their perspective. Would you want to work with you after you posted this? –  Aug 16 '17 at 06:36
  • @Pete: I have a handicap in judging things that aren't perceived from my point. But I think I get your point. Anyways I feel like OP is just a valid post about a problem I'm facing and not being sure how to handle it, since I can't elaborate the possible outcome of the options I see. Quiet well defined scope if one asked me. – Zaibis Aug 16 '17 at 06:45
  • I don't think it's a dupe, but the discussion here might be useful: https://workplace.stackexchange.com/questions/85896/how-to-disclose-negative-information-about-a-candidate-when-id-rather-not-revea – user812786 Aug 16 '17 at 12:40
  • @whrrgarbl: Yeah was an interesting read, but doesn't help with my problem here. The main diference is, I don't want to get anyone out of something. I just know how SHE behaves in workplace, since I knew her for long enough to consider it unprofessional (starting an affair with her manager just 1 month after starting there was the least unprofessional of many things). My research about them, I did not to find evidence to get them away, but to find evidence if she might have changed and I don't have that much reasons to be in fear. – Zaibis Aug 16 '17 at 13:21
  • I had not at all in mind bein able to prevent it since I know this will just be unprofessional. But I'm scared if she is still the same person she was like 2 years ago, that she will be more focused on ruining my reputation as on doing her job. And thats no speculation, thats given. This statement isn't even biased, it had been statements she once used describing her self. So after I couldn't find anythign about her, but figured out that he isn't much diferent as she was. Letting me assume that its more likely that she hasn't changed much rather that he casued her to change in some regards. – Zaibis Aug 16 '17 at 13:22
  • But I never had in mind to find ways to get rid of them. My research was more meant to prepare my self for what to expect. That I have some hope now being able to use what I figured out to maybe prevent the situation at all, no doubt, is an option I would prefer. But I'm biased here, so hard for me to judge if I should really bring it up at all or take it as it comes and just report unprofessional behavior on their site, but then I'm not sure if at some point they justify it with 'yeah, thats just because back then he....' possibly letting come up why I haven't mentioned that. – Zaibis Aug 16 '17 at 13:23
  • And thats actually my dilemma. Its not me wanting to get them away, but me not knowing whats the way I should handle what I just learned. – Zaibis Aug 16 '17 at 13:23
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    So just to clarify, you 1. don't want to be assigned to work with them, and 2. don't think they should be given the job at all? I think the first is very reasonable to request without needing to reveal your research (that's what had reminded me of the question I linked). For the second, I defer to the answer section :) – user812786 Aug 16 '17 at 14:12
  • @whrrgarbl: To 1. I would prefer to not, but wouldn't get around that as the project they would work on is maintained by my team. To 2nd: From my biased personal point of view, of course I don't think so, at last just because it would be the only way to achieve point 1. But as the professional I should be, I don't know what I should think, since I'm biased here and can't change it. Thats why I asked this here. To get an non biased feedback. – Zaibis Aug 17 '17 at 06:17
  • Meta post on reopening now it has been edited: https://workplace.meta.stackexchange.com/q/4744/647 – Rory Alsop Aug 17 '17 at 11:08
  • if i find out that a contractor has had a relationship with an employee that turned sour then i would rather not hire that contractor and i'd appreciate that employee telling me. – eMBee Aug 18 '17 at 06:56
  • @eMBee: I think I would do the same if I was the employer. But my impression is that the community on this site has a general view of not being professional if an employee would expect the employer that way. So I wanted some kind of neutral viewpoint thoughts been taken into consideration. – Zaibis Aug 18 '17 at 07:02
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    i can't imagine how. a bad relationship between a contractor and an employee is bad for the company. if for some reason the situation is unavoidable, i'd find a way for the employee to stay out of the way. on the other side, if i was a contracting company, and one of my employees had a bad relationship with an employee from the client, i would consider this a red flag and either terminate the project or find a way to not have this employee work on it. the difficulty is of course to judge how bad it really is. the employee coming to me might exaggerate, so it depends how much i trust them. – eMBee Aug 18 '17 at 07:25
  • @whrrgarbl: Still planing to answer this? I'm really loooking forward to your answer. – Zaibis Aug 18 '17 at 09:19

1 Answers1

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If you have experience that indicates having these contractors working with you would be negative, cost your organisation more than appropriate, or cause questions around their conduct, then yes, you should notify.

I would suggest your personal experience with her is a significant issue, so raising this early is important. Even if you just let your boss know that you would find it very difficult to work with them as she had an affair and then left you for the other person.

As to the online information, you don't need to say that this was the result of a long investigation. You could just point out that his public postings online indicate his work ethic and conduct are not appropriate.

Do this sooner rather than later, though, otherwise your boss may have significantly invested in them coming on board...

Rory Alsop
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  • This is the answer I was hoping for. But since my OP received serveral downvotes, I assume there are probably other opinions around. And since I'm not searching for confirmation in first point but for help figuring out the possible side-effect consequences of my options, I will wait some time before accepting an answer. – Zaibis Aug 16 '17 at 13:30
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    @Zaibis make sure you have the evidence of poor work ethic to hand though... – numenor Aug 17 '17 at 13:02