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I've been working for a company for some time now and there are many changes in the company coming from the owners. I do understand all the changes and why they're making them and I would have done the same. But as an employee, I am not interested in going along for this journey. I have told the boss, based on how they structure the company and what kind of people they want to attract that I'm what they are looking for but they are not what I'm looking for.

The thing is at the moment they are kind of depending on me and I don't want to leave them in a situation where they cannot complete what we've started together. I've tried to be very clear that they need to find somebody to replace me, but it does not look like they're taking me seriously.

How long time should I give them before I decide to go somewhere else? I feel like I gave them a fair chance to replace me while I was still there and they haven't tried.

Many people would love the job; they pay a good salary and offer a great and safe environment for people.

But for me, this is not what I'm looking for and the whole business domain they are in is not something I want to extend my knowledge in.

How long is reasonable to give them to find somebody to replace me? I have contract defining a notice period but want to be fair and not suddenly leave them.

Fredric Shope
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Mr Zach
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    The appropriate time to give them is your notice period. That's what a notice period is for. – Irene Liberali May 11 '21 at 07:29
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    I really admire your loyalty, but the reason they haven't started looking is you haven't handed in your notice. People say all sorts of things, but actions speak louder than words, they won't reACT until you ACT. – PeterH May 11 '21 at 07:34
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    You need to give us a country. In most countries the length of notice is regulated. If you are a regular employee it is almost certainly in your contract. – RedSonja May 11 '21 at 07:58
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    Do you own shares in the business? Are you married into the owner's family? No. Then go! They'll move on quicker than you imagine, too. – PatrickT May 11 '21 at 08:17
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    You didn't start things together. They (i.e. the company) started something while you were their employee. – Jasper May 11 '21 at 11:46
  • Congrats its time to start leaving! Find your new job first. – Mark Rogers May 11 '21 at 17:34
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    Your replacement is not your responsibility, it is theirs. Period. – RBarryYoung May 11 '21 at 20:22
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    Keep in mind that people are frequently perceived (by themselves or others) as being critical to the continued day-to-day running of a business or project, because they are the only person who knows how to do various important tasks. In reality, these people often leave without any real handover and the business finds a way to muddle along regardless; usually less-efficiently for some period of time (often at cost with lots of avoidable mistakes being made) otherwise most "critical" personnel tend to be quite replaceable one way or another. – Ben Cottrell May 12 '21 at 11:02
  • Are you 100% certain they're not already looking for your replacement? What if they find him and you're still wishy-washy about whether you should leave or not? You'll be out on your ear with no income and maybe some severance pay, depending on local laws/customs. – FreeMan May 12 '21 at 13:27
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    "How long time should I give them before I decide to go somewhere else?" Zero. They have no claim to your thoughts. Decide for yourself, with total freedom. "How long is reasonable to give them to find somebody to replace me? I have contract defining a notice period" the notice period, then. You don't owe them anything they wouldn't do, and your contract defines each party's obligations. If they decided you weren't the right fit for them any more, would they wring their hands about what was "fair" to you? – Alex M May 13 '21 at 18:30

5 Answers5

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You've told them you might leave. They haven't reacted. Do not wait for them to start hiring your replacement before you look for your next job. Start looking for your next job now. You've decided. Your heart is no longer in this job. You have no obligation to leave immediately or to leave without a new job, but it's time to start looking for that new job, and looking seriously.

Optionally, tell them you're looking. This might get them to be more serious about looking to replace you. Or it might prompt them to beg, wheedle, bribe, and guilt you into changing your mind. The only upside is a sense of integrity if you feel you should alert them to your imminent departure.

Once you have an offer and have accepted it, give your two weeks notice (or whatever is required by your contract or local laws and customs.) Don't let anyone try to change your mind. If anyone is angry to you or suggests you have been unfair, remind them of the many times you told them that you had decided this job was not for you in the long run. Remember that you have done right by them even at some small risk to your own comfort. Then leave as scheduled, and enjoy your new job.

Kate Gregory
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  • "The only upside is a sense of integrity" — how about a positive reference letter? Counting on matching integrity, I might expect a parting reference letter going the extra mile. – Levente May 10 '21 at 20:58
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    I never count on references. I don't do things in the hope of getting them either. Either do what's right because it's right, or do what's best for yourself. Don't do what's best for someone else and hope they give you a minimal reward for it. – Kate Gregory May 10 '21 at 21:07
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    @Levente reference letters mean almost nothing, and are just another "con" used by companies to make workers behave. – Fattie May 10 '21 at 22:48
  • Don't quit, ask for severance. And while you're asking for severance, hold on to your new offer. – obscurans May 11 '21 at 08:30
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    Just to emphasize the gist of this excellent answer: Ho do you (OP) expect your employer to react to your announcement to (perhaps) quit? Certainly you don't want them to replace you before you have found a new job? Assuming your employer is decent, their reasoning might be: "Mr Zach keeps telling us he might leave, but he still hasn't given notice. It would be good to start looking for a replacement, but since we don't want to force him out, we can't really commit to hiring someone else yet." – henning May 11 '21 at 09:10
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    Two weeks notice. That's not necessarily the law or the OP's contract obligation in the relevant country. It could be longer or shorter. And the OP should note that generally an employee's obligations are different from an employers with regard to notice - don't assume they are the same. Typically a law will state minimum periods of notice which a contract cannot overrule. – StephenG - Help Ukraine May 11 '21 at 12:51
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    Imo, you don't need to tell them you're looking. You've already informed them that they need to replace you. That's all the warning they need; if they fail to act on it that's on them. Honestly, the fact that you haven't started looking immediately is in itself kind of reckless. Once you find a new position you can let them know once more that you'll be leaving. And that's all there is to it.. – silvascientist May 12 '21 at 04:47
  • If I'd change jobs every time my heart was no longer in it, I'd change jobs thrice a year. New jobs are rarely what they're advertised to be and it's part of being a professional to get around that problem. – Mast May 13 '21 at 09:42
  • @Mast it sounds like you’re not using interviews correctly. You should be assessing them + the job to work out if “your heart will be in it”. Plus, there’s a (big) difference between “heart no longer being in it” and “heart never being in it”. – Tim May 13 '21 at 11:39
  • @Tim There's only so much you can do if whoever you're talking to is more of a salesmen than a reputable source of information. – Mast May 13 '21 at 15:34
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I have been in your place in very, very similar situation.

I worked at a company for 5 years and had quite many responsibilities to transfer to the potential new colleague that would replace me.

I gave that company a time of 3 months to find a proper replacement for me and to do a proper knowledge transfer without any rush. Although, I was very loyal to the company and gave them such notice, they weren't too loyal to me, unfortunately.

They gave me two options - either I stay for another two years and we try to find some new and more interesting project to work on or I leave after a month.

After such ultimatum I had only one option in mind and right away, after telling them that I want to part ways, they cut off my health insurance (in Europe). After a month I was gone. In retrospect, I feel very happy that I didn't flinch and stayed there for 2 more years.

Suggestion for you:

You already informed your boss that you're not happy with the direction company goes towards. In Europe usually it is a good practice to inform company 1 month prior to your "departure". I'd say give it a month and it should be fine. Your final month will feel very long, trust me.

Alexander Gusev
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    You probably should have told them you'd stay for two more years, and then have left in two months after finding a new job – Aaron F May 11 '21 at 09:38
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    That wasn't an option because they wanted me to sign written agreement between me and the company that I will stay for two more years. After talking to some other HR managers from different companies they said that this experience is something crazy that they hadn't heard of yet in my country. Company management was being childish like they just lost their ice-cream and had a tantrum. – Alexander Gusev May 11 '21 at 10:31
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    Ah I see! Then, yes, better just leave, like you did :-) The agreement they wanted you to sign wouldn't have been legal in Europe, but it would have been additional stress to involve lawyers to fight it :-/ – Aaron F May 11 '21 at 13:32
  • I can see that they can make you sign something saying that you will stay for two years, but I can't see how they would get any productive work out of you if you want to go. – D Duck May 11 '21 at 23:45
  • Does signing on for 2 years also include a clause saying that they won't let you go in those two years? – D Duck May 11 '21 at 23:47
  • Well, it didn't go so far for me to see that agreement. I am not the guy who will tolerate ultimatum's regarding my job. I feel like IT world possibilities are too big for even seeing such agreements. I feel like being in such company is not healthy for my professional growth nor for my mental health. – Alexander Gusev May 12 '21 at 06:33
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    It certainly depends on "Europe" but in the several countries I know (starting with France) these things are completely regulated. For instance in our case, for generic employees the notice is 3 months, except if there are mutual arrangements. The company can show you the door at the moment you hand over your resignation letter, but you are paid 3 months anyway. It is not "customary" to inform your company a month before handing your resignation letter, except in cases where there is mutual will to help each other (yes, this exists) – WoJ May 12 '21 at 13:08
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    Sign contract for two years, work at other company the entire time. – Mad Physicist May 12 '21 at 19:20
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How long is reasonable to give them to find somebody to replace me?

No time whatsoever. You have already gone far beyond any reasonable expectation. If they don't act on it, that's their problem. Start looking for new jobs tomorrow.

I have contract defining a notice period but want to be fair and not suddenly leave them.

You have been more than fair already. The notice period is the one that you both contractually agreed to (and the expectation is that you will honor it) but nothing more. If you feel charitable you can offer a week or two of extra notice if that fits your plans, but I wouldn't delay the start of a new job because of that.

jo1storm
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Hilmar
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  1. Look for a new job.
  2. Once you have an offer, decide if it seems like a better situation than your current one.
  3. If so, give the customary and/or contracted notice.

They’re not going to change the company because you want it changed, you need to accept that. But at any rate, by following this three step plan, you can see if positive progress has been made when it matters - which is when you have another job offer.

Don’t make it more complicated than this. They didn’t when they made their decision.

mxyzplk
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If you died today, they'd have a posting on Monster more quickly than your family could write your obituary!!!

Do not be fooled into some notion that you're some indispensible Luke Skywalker who is somehow the only hope of a veritable Princess-Leia-In-Distress, Incorporated. Find your new job, taking into account any legally required notice period, and LEAVE. Your current employer will just have to adjust. What happens after you leave is not your headache, due to the fact that you're an employee and not a principal of the business. Their risk in the market is not YOUR risk -- that's life.

Best of luck on your next opportunity.

Xavier J
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