Should I tell my manager how unhappy I am when I want to quit anyway?

Question

I work in this company for over 15 years as a software developer. During the last years employees have left the company again and again and I have taken over their work. This includes work like administration and helpdesk. These jobs are deeply repugnant to me. I do not like them and I am neither qualified nor trained for them. My colleagues know how unhappy I am but my direct manager doesn't seem to notice. Or he ignores it. He gives me more of that kind of work.

I'm already looking for a new job. Should I still tell him how unhappy I am or is it better to accept it in silence until I quit?

Answer 1

It's always okay to have a career development discussion with your manager. That typically involves

1. Current State: What's are you currently doing, what are your good/bad at, what do you like/don't like
2. Desired state: where do you want to be in a few years,
3. Alignment: Your manager agrees with your future state
4. The plan: agree on specific steps, actions and metrics to get there
5. execute plan: keep do the actions, track the metrics

Stick to this script. If your manager doesn't want to engage or does not agree or commit to goals and specific actions & metrics, then you have your answer: It's not going to get better, so you should start looking.

If there is a credible plan, then it's worth giving it a shot. Track metrics and progress regularly and discuss with your manager. If it's going well, you get what you want, if it's fizzling out, start looking.

You DON'T tell your manager that you are considering leaving as it comes across as a threat. A good manager will know and a bad manager is not worth dealing with.

You DON'T need to tell your manager that you are unhappy although you can. That should emerge naturally from the conversation. If your "current state" is very different from your "desired state", there is clearly a disconnect, which will be obvious to a good manager.

Answer 2

You don't know with any certainty that your manager realises how unhappy you are. Maybe you are the last person he'd want to see leave. Perhaps he would be willing do everything in his power to prevent it.

If he doesn't know, he can't change anything for you.

You should definitely discuss your current role and responsibilities with him. Explain the aspects of the job you like and dislike. While you're at it, discuss your career goals and find out how he sees your position in the company evolving over the next 1, 2 or 5 years. Perhaps he has a plan for you in that he hasn't communicated yet.

While it's good to talk, don't tell him you are planning to leave. If you're going to stick around you want to foster a good working relationship between you. The last thing you need is any suggestion that you tried to threaten or strong arm over it.

Answer 3

Nothing wrong having a discussion with your manager, ideally it should be part of your catch-up meeting or more formal 1-to-1. Just state the facts in what is causing you to be unhappy in your current position. Any manager worth their salt should be willing to hear you out. And if you have valid points look to make some changes. After all, it is easier to make changes for a current employee than to start a search for a new one!

Answer 4

If you're already looking for a new job, just focus on that. There is nothing that can be said to undo what your experiences have been, and even if they correct course, you're still going to have resentment, and will end up looking in a few months anyway.

Focus on your job hunt, make sure it's something you will enjoy, and will appreciate your talents and skills. It sounds like they're on the way to making you redundant anyway. Expressing anything to your manager at this point would just be telegraphing your move, and giving them time to replace you, or even push you out the door before you are ready.

Even the best case scenario, at this point, is that they throw you something to appease you for now, and then later, things creep back to where they are now.

Now, once you get the job offer, don't accept any counter-offer from your current employer. That almost never turns out well, and it's not worth the risk that you'd be the exception.

This bridge has already been burned, leave before it collapses.

Answer 5

NEVER LET YOUR EMPLOYER KNOW THAT YOU ARE LOOKING FOR A NEW JOB!! That must be your best kept secret. Lot of unexpected and undesired things can happen if you do that.

Regarding changing jobs, the plan should be like this:

1. Find a job, get to the contract phase.
2. Ask the new company to let you have a discussion with your current employer - to give your current employer a chance to react.
3. Submit the resignation form, while starting the discussion about if the company whats to keep you or not, and which benefits they will provide extra.
4. Based on the outcome, make your decision, informing all parties about it.

Note: always have a backup solution. Make sure you will not risk remaining unemployed.

---

Improving the work conditions at the current job is independent of finding a new job. Just have a discussion F2F with your manager and tell them about what you want / need. Together, make a plan. Sometimes, just asking makes a huge difference. DO NOT MENTION THAT YOU CONSIDER LEAVING THE COMPANY!! Do not even admit it, if the boss asks.