You have to consider the elastic properties of the contact to determine the distribution of forces. Actually, it is the distribution of pressure you are interested, since you sum up the pressures to get force, and sum of the moment of pressure to get torque. Imagine a contact area with the center is on the contact point, the z-axis normal to the contact, and the xy plane along the contact.
$$ \begin{aligned}
F_z & = \int P(x,y) \, {\rm d} A \\
M_x & = \int (-y) P(x,y) \,{\rm d} A \\
M_y & = \int (+x) P(x,y)\, {\rm d} A
\end{aligned} $$
So given a pressure distribution $P(x,y)$ you can find the forces, but how to get the pressure distribution?
The most basic example is an object pushing on a flat plane. Consider the case where there is a known overlap amount $a(x,y)$ as a function of location on the contact

As a result, the surface of the object (red curve) must deform by $\delta(x,y)$ in order to conform to the overlap. Surface pressure (yellow curve) must be applied to the object to do this

The pressure deflection relationship was developed by Boussinesq and it looks like this
$$ \delta(x,y) = \frac{1-\nu^2}{\pi E} \iint \frac{P(u,v)}{r} {\rm d} A $$
where $r=\sqrt{(x-u)^2+(y-v)^2}$ and $\nu$ is the Poisson's ratio of the material and $E$ is the Elastic modulus.
A special case for the above is the Hertzian contact which deals with a sphere on a plane, sphere on a sphere, cylinder on a cylinder (2D contact) and general football shape (two radii) contact.
The general case can only be treated numerically with the contact are divided into a grid and a giant system of equations is developed of the form $\delta_i = C_{i j} P_j$ (Hartnett solution).
The steps are as follows:
- Assume a certain amount of overlap $a(x,y)$ derived from the maximum penetration amount.
- Set the deflections equal to the overlap, and solve for the pressures $P(x,y)$.
- Calculate the total load and moments, and adjust the overlap accordingly. If the total load is less than the applied load then increase the overlap, and if the total moment is less than the applied torque then tilt the object
- If the forces and moments are still imbalanced, then go to step 2 and repeat until convergence has been achieved.
See this detailed paper for one example on numerical contact analysis. And here is a paper from NIST with some theory on the general contact problem.