I think you are grossly mistaken in the fact that bicycles do not have heavy loads.
Consider me on my bike. I have measured that I can pull up with the rear foot 25 kg using clipless pedals. I have also measured that I can pull up from the handlebar at a force of 30 kg. I weigh 110 kg. If I pedal uphill on a high gear accelerating hard, my force on rear pedal is 25 kg, and my force at front pedal is 110+25+30 kg = 165 kg. That's a total of 190 kg or 1864 N at a crank arm of 175 mm, which is a torque of 326 Nm.
That's more torque than in my 2.5 liter car engine which produces only about 210 Nm! Now of course, the car engine being a 4-cylinder isn't completely smooth so maybe it has higher peaks than 210 Nm around a full rotation, but still I think my bike wins on torque.
What bicycles are: very very high torque/force, very very low speed devices. Like steam locomotives.
Bikes also carry lot of load for the weight. A car of 1500 kg maybe carries 500 kg load. That's third of its weight. A bike of 13 kg carries a load of 130 kg. That's ten times its weight!
Also bikes, having no suspension, have to absorb huge road imperfection impacts, while carrying ten times their weight as load, whereas a car carrying third of its weight as load, has very good suspension that reduces peak forces caused by road imperfections.
Electric motors and internal combustion engines achieve what they can do, not by huge torque (their torque is usually insignificant compared to the torque of bicycles), but by huge speed. Power is torque times speed. Maybe some low-speed two-stroke marine diesel engines used in large container ships are the exception to the rule that internal combustion engines are high-speed low-torque devices.
As for why roller bearings aren't used, many bike bearings need to handle side loads. Thus, they are angular contact bearings. Consider what happens to an angular contact roller bearing: the contact surface is conical, so its radius is larger at one end than at the other. At the high radius side, the rollers would have to roll a larger distance than at the low radius side. This is impossible without skating. So the roller bearing actually would function mostly as a plain bearing! It would require very good lubrication at all times, and a failure of lubrication would immediately destroy the bearing. Bike bearings aren't lubricated as well as car engines where plain bearings function well due to excellent lubrication. Furthermore, the roller skating would dissipate energy as heat, which is unacceptable on bikes where all energy loss mechanisms need to be minimized because there's so little human power available.
Actually, roller bearings where tried on bikes when headset ball bearings would often develop a condition called "indexed steering": https://www.sheldonbrown.com/brandt/indexed-steering.html
Roller bearings of various designs have been tried, and it appears that they were possibly the ones that finally made obvious that fore and aft motion was the culprit all along; a motion that roller bearings were less capable of absorbing than balls. This recognition lead to using spherical alignment seats under the rollers. Although this stopped dimpling, these bearings worked poorly because the needle complement tended to shift off center, skewing the needles and causing large bearing friction as the rollers skated.
Roller bearings didn't help there. Later, it was recognised that a cartridge bearing system where the cartridge sits on a 45 degree conical surface of the bearing cup helped. In this case, actually, the headset bearing is a compound bearing: a ball bearing takes rotation motion, while the 45 degree conical surface functions as a plain bearing, taking the impacts that would destroy earlier rigid headset designs with the "indexed steering" condition. This compound bearing works well as long as the plain bearing remains lubricated. Today, nearly all headsets are these cartridge bearing designs, that have the compound bearing system, and indexed steering is a thing of the past.
So you are also incorrect in that only ball bearings are used on bikes. Actually, the modern headset is a compound bearing: a ball bearing for rotation, and a plain bearing for taking fore-to-aft impacts.
(Note the sheldonbrown.com link mentions spherical seat -- today, the seat is usually conical, and it functions as well as a spherical seat)